More peaceful here with my mom being left to her own devices. Haven't heard from her physical therapist in a couple of weeks, but for me, as long as her aide comes and bathes her twice a week, I'm a happy camper. We all are. Mom especially, of course.
I told her yesterday that I wasn't going to tell her to do anything anymore. I'd mentioned here that my husband had suggested we lay off of her. Hadn't told her yet, though. Some folks might think that's extreme, an all-or-nothing sort of situation. Okay, it is sort of is just that. Sadly I can see her losing some of her strength. She has a harder time getting to a standing position. Takes more effort. More tries. Up, then down. Once more. Finally up and moving. Walking slower. More grasping of her walker. Hard to stand in an upright position because of the fear of falling. Her eyes are glued to the floor and her feet moving between the legs of her walker. Hard to watch.
But she's happier, if you can get your head around that. Maybe happy is a relative term. Circumstantial.
I'm driven to do handwork. Bought soft creamy pale yellow yarn for one baby blanket and middle daughter will make the other one. Made a stack of my favorite stitching books. Sticky notes in pages. Tidying hanks of embroidery thread that have been neglected. Organizing needles. Bought a new crochet hook. A rebirth of what I enjoy when I sit. Handwork is so addictive anyway, which is a wonderful diversion now.
Use the brain. Never stop thinking and trying to solve problems. Not to say mental inactivity is to blame for my mom's predicament (she did have a complete blockage of an artery with the first stroke), but she was one for cleaning and talking on the phone, never for any length of time was into deep creative work. I understand that, but I see in both her and my mother-in-law a diminished mental ability. Both women lived to clean, but didn't have hobbies. Both are suffering from some sort of dementia, stroke or not. I tell you, there's a connection. I fear that.
So until someone tells me different I'll walk on treadmill, try to lose weight and keep my head busy. And why not?