But all in all, tidier. And with 6 kids gone, fewer interruptions when I get a bee in my bonnet to do a project.
Youngest son recently found a book in his room, one he said I'd given him awhile back, but I have no recollection of it. The artist Anne Truitt's 'Daybook.' In it, she keeps a diary of her progress on her work, and she's very, very thought-provoking. Reading her last night, I truly gave myself permission for today. With a husband set on *go* all the time, which you know, I have to mentally resist following suit, or rather feeling guilty when I stay in bed late after tea in the morning.
Life is mentally trying now for everyone, and adding a November wedding to the mix for us is a little daunting (a word I've never used, but it fits). Something I read in another book the other day sticks in my mind. The main character is attracted to a guy friend of hers because he allows her room to, as she calls it, push back. I never push back. I take what folks set in my lap, rarely giving myself the consideration to either, refuse to participate, or to wrestle over it. I just take it. Not healthy and I end up feeling like a punching bag.
Think I'll schedule me a staycation. Let the 3 folks I live with know of the situation, and stick to my guns. A week, or a long weekend with only what I allow. Even thinking about it sounds refreshing. And while it might sound weird, it's the intention that appeals. Sure, I only leave for grocery store trips, but to stay here with the focus on self-care, and not just *managing* might make the difference.
Have a nice night.